That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
