turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
