But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Alive.
So much puke
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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