i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
