omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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