I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
