I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Randomize
