My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
This house was built for laser tag.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize