What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
