I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize