My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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