I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize