Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
