hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Randomize
