Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
