My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
