Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
