why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
