You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize