So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize