Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
