He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize