Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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