i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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