We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
