She's JV to your varsity
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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