she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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