it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
