should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
