Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize
