I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
