Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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