I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
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