I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
