Got a toothbrush?
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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