Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
