my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
There are leaves in my underwear?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
