I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
