Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
