week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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