I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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