BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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