Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
