The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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