yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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