there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
