Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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