Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Enjoy the penises
If I had your ass I would rule the world
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
