Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
