how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
