i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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